Friday, April 22, 2011

Surrogacy Diaries...5 Supportive People

Someone asked me (yet again) under my latest video how i could give "up" the baby. I replied, honestly.
If you would like to see the actual comments exchanged, they are some of the very first on this video

Just a little bit ago, I received this sweet message (used with permission). It actually brought a tear to my eye. I love connecting with people, for whatever the reason...

"I just watched your lates video. You are the first woman that I have heard admit that we are not always attached to our babies at birth. I felt that way with all four of my children. I loved them as soon as I knew I was pregnant, but not the way I do now. Hearng this from some one else made me feel less guilty, knowing I'm not the only one. ! tried to be a surrogate for 2 years and I have gone through 3 agencies. The first agency accepted my applcation, but couldn't use me unless they had ALL of my OB records. You would think it would be easy to get since they are yours, but that was not the case. The second agency was okay. They would find me potential matches and then their clinics wouldn't want me because I had a section with my oldest, because my children where too "large", or because they wanted all my records too.After that I decided to try one more agency and if it happened great, if not maybe it wasn't ment to be. I applied at my agency on Jan 1, 2011, and I am now matched:) The contracts have been signed and I fly out for my medical screening on Monday. I wish you the best of luck and I kow it's going to happen for you. Just hang in there:)!!"

I replied with this....

"I always am scared that people will take that the wrong way and think i dont love them. that couldnt be farther from the truth! i LOVE my boys with all my heart...and soul...and then some...but at birth, i just wasnt there. i didnt feel like i knew them. of course i loved them then, but i wasnt attached, nor was i bonded.

I even asked the nurse why i didnt feel like it was my it was some foreign experience.. she said i had no clue how many mothers secretly ask her the same thing. we all want to be the best we can be so we worry that if we arent bonded right away, that it will appear negative in our society.

I just gave up...i cant please everyone. only myself. so i have come to love that quality, because it will enable me to provide someone (i hope) with a gift i have already been blessed with.

may i use your words in my blog? i will NOT put your username or identity in it...i just want people to know that its is normal. If not i understand, but its worth asking :)

let me know when you transfer and how everything goes! you are an inspiration!

have a wonderful weekend!


Guess it pays to just keep it real :)

No comments:

Post a Comment